Fifa Church

so germany played england and won. It was one of the best games I've seen so far this world cup and it made me think that England had more spunk than I originally gave them credit for...but deep down...and i do mean deep. This german squad has kinda won me over. They had me at Podolski...the German press called him lazy last week...(probably the worst thing you can say if your German) but I say, when he smiles the planet earth finds equilibrium...or stops spinning...or something. I just think that between all the young talent and speed that Germany has mixed with the intimidation factor of Sweinsteigler; well it's a pretty lethal mix.

Argentina is too arrogant, I was hoping for Mexico to snuff that flame out, but Maradona really has brought out something good in his players. And even though their win came with some questionable goal calls. A win is a win and this is sudden death elimination so as project runway would say, 'either you are in, or you are out.'

And whats with Brazil and Portugals match where no body did anything and Cristinao Rinaldo just pranced around like he didn't have a care in the world...or maybe he was planning his next clothing line...but really I feel like those players didn't get the memo that this is the world cup...this is where you make your country proud...playing it safe just looks so unattractive especially when lesser teams are playing amazing matches. The US against Ghana was so amazing, and Denmark being eliminated by Japan with some of the most amazing penalty goals ever...I was starting to think that no one scores on a corner kick, or free kick but Japan was amazing...

Anyway Japan now plays Paraguay on Tuesday morning-which i will be watching-my last Asian hope against my South American underdog...I am so conflicted...I want them both in! To play some scrappy football; and for Portugal and Brazil to get penalized for making thousands of people watch the most boring 2 hours of arrogant males strutting around doing nothing...

tomorrow I have to work so will miss out on the games...poop.

Dear Canadian Mennonite University

To whom it may concern,

I will be staying at Canadian University with the chess group that has booked rooms and I am letting you know I am wheelchair bound. I am glad to see that your facilities are equipped to handle a case like mine. However, wheelchair bound that I am, I am in charge of providing security for the chess players. I took this upon myself as i happened to notice that your city is fraught with crime. One can never be too safe, and so I have organized a security detail for the chess club. It will consist of me, and some necessary items i will bring in order to maintain a secure atmosphere for the chess club. I will be bringing mace, handcuffs, a fog horn, and a special club. Concerning the club, it is about 2 1/2 feet long and resembles a fat baseball bat. Do not be alarmed. I do not intend on using the club unless provoked. My primary question is can I reserve a room for the security equipment that I will be bringing? This would also double as security office for myself. Could it also be in a central location so i would be able to visibly see the chess players at all times? I do use binoculars but have found that buildings can obstruct my view which hampers my job immensely. Good security is essential in allowing the chess players to better focus their skills and not worry about their safety. Thank you for your concideration and attention to this matter. I am looking forward to staying at your illustrious university during the month of July. You will recognize me as I will be wearing a black shirt that says security (in caps) in white along the chest for the duration of my stay.

Respectfully,

John Smith

This post is brought to you by the letter M

As I have sat watching copious amounts of beautiful soccer plays I have come to notice a particular habit of, well, even coaching staff at the fifa world cup...spitting. At first I tried to narrow it down to a specific continent or even particular teams that might be the culprit for such an awkward habit. But no, it just is...which then brought me to thinking...I do that from time to time. And so here is my scientific rationalization for even thinking that spitting is now attractive because it is part of world cup soccer...

mucus...

no really, the natural way your body rids itself of harmful germs is through the movement of mucus-thats why we have embarrassing hairs in our nose- in soccer you run and run and your out in the open air with your open mouth shouting things and the mucus just wants to come out too...so I have pardoned all the spitting going on in South Africa for the sake of...mucus.

also since we are dealing with M's...can i just say that Argentina's player Messi is pretty much amazing. i do agree with the commentators calling him the golden boot...oh my word, I have practically fallen in love with his feet they make such pretty plays...Greece had 3 guys on him sometimes and his 2 feet made those other 6 feet look like a junior high boys feet at a dance...or mine for that matter...anyway, Messi has amazing feet but like all people he has his flaws...glaring, undeniable flaws like his haircut. He looks like a bad combination of Farrah Faucett and Steve Nash...maybe thats why I have noticed his feet so much cause everytime I look at his head I cringe alittle...this guy makes enough money to pay for a decent hair cut...he doesn't need to look like a Charlie's Angel...M is for Messi Makeover!

South Korea is moving on to face Uruguay...
And Mexico will face Argentina who are the only team to win every match in their pool so far...and so for all the haters...Maradonna might be a bit of a drama king...but his team is pulling it together which earned my respect; but I still think they haven't faced any real threat yet...
I mean the only real tricky part of their match against Greece was for the commentators who had to keep all the greek names straight...

"so we have pompdopolous, to enoudopolous, to christinopolous, back to pompodopolous...going deep to theolopodopolous...and now the Argentinians have intercepted with Veron, to Martinez, up to Messi and...."

You could pratically hear the commentators sigh of relief everytime the Argentinians had possession, it must have been tough keeping a straight face, I was laughing cause I thought is was just too funny...

Why I like soccer...

the commentators...

"...here comes the winner of the player of Africa award this year, taking this free kick for the Elephants (Ivory Coast). This should be a good chance for them against this Brazilian powerhouse...
that was probably the worst kick of the whole world cup! That was horrid, what was he thinking. Wait, the Elephants just got another free kick coming, hopefully they do better on this try. They certainly couldn't do any worse than the last one."

"He has the heart of a pig!" aside (apparently pigs hearts are bigger than humans...so then I got to thinking about valentines day and greeting cards...because yes, this is how my brain works and 'my pig heart beats for you' is just wrong on so many different levels). end of aside

"New Zealand has just accomplished a 1-1 draw with the defending world cup champions Italy. No one here expected New Zealand to come to the world cup with any talent, and they didn't. But they have managed to achieve something great here, and their coach should certainly be getting a pay raise for their efforts today."

Also the fact that major upsets have happened...I like this, this makes me happy. France can just boycott their last game for all I care. Seriouly, the drama, sending the star player home cause he's a potty mouth, then accusations of a traitor in their midst for leaking this news to the public...really, you think we wouldn't figure something was up when he didn't show up on the feild for their next game...so I say France...well, i just can't say much more than that really...France...

And I really like that Paraguay won today. I was chatting with Micha about it before the weekend and she was trying so hard not to get to excited. "Maria, they always never play as hard against weaker teams, then loose games they really should be winning. And then we have to say so many 'Hail Mary's' so that they can play well for the next game. I am really worried for them."

today was a great day for world cup...Italy drew with New Zealand, Paraguay won and Brazil won as well proving that South America has shown up to the fifa world cup 2010.

but of course the real reason i like soccer so much is Kaka, or Villar, Winston Reid, Javier Mascherano...to name a few...

so well here is my fathers day gift dad...

ok, so this was going to be AMAZING! and I was going to rock my first singing telegram...I got into the whole mash-up of 2 songs together because of watching glee...and I was so sure I could put something out there that would shock and awe you Dad...but sadly...well you'll see for yourself...it has brought me back down to earth but not my love for you dad...my love for you is big enough to bring out the most embarrassing moment ever...and say...happy fathers day to the best dad EVER...my singing ability is no reflection of your parenting...

love you my most, your yang ketiga....

the referee's call

today I think that all the fifa world cup games are actually about who the ref is. It doesn't matter how you play just what your whistled for and then how that psychologically affects your team's perspective...

example one...germany versus serbia...with names like swiensteigler (pig crawler) who wouldn't be afraid of messing with the germans...but add a strict ref from spain (I think secretly he was just sad his team lost their first no brainer against switzerland and is now trying to bring down all the arrogant power-house teams), about 6 yellow cards to the german side, and germany playing a man down for 3/4 of the match and you have a Serbian victory of historic proportions...I mean it's the first world cup game they have won as Serbia...the ref whistled absolutely every possible call he could and effectively put the german team on eggshells for 60 minutes of his dictatorship. The newspapers will hail this as a serbian winning upset of the tourney so far, but I say the refs domination ultimately played the feild to perfection.

example two...slovenia versus the united states...amazingly the US is a favorite to win this match...do american's even know how to play soccer is the first question one should be asking...add a ref who lets things get messy and makes the american's work through their innability to grasp that yes, soccer can sometimes be a contact sport, and yes, someone might get in your way as you try and make a go for the net...a little pushing, a little shoving, lots of getting your feet stuck in between someone elses-this is soccer. But the american's did rally to make thier game a 2-2 draw, they actually got the ball into the oppositions net 3 times but the ref blew the whistle on a (you guessed it) foul...just before the shot was made. You can't seem to get past the ref, when he doesn't call it, your upset...and just when he calls a foul...you score a goal and are equally upset when it doesn't count. So, while I think the American's did an admirable job of getting back into a game that had gone awry...once again, it was the ref who actually decided what the final score was.

once again, it's not who played the game, but how the ref called it that counts...isn't that a bumper sticker somewhere?

ps I think my coworkers are amazed at my ability to get completely addicted to just about anything...I mean, I have always liked soccer, but this world cup is making me a crazy person, I got myself out of bed at 7am to watch germany play...who does that...I have to work until 11 tonight...I am officially diagnosing myself with world cup fever...

When dreams are just dreams...

North Korea played today. North Korea is the lowest ranked team to make it into the world cup of soccer. They played one of the winning est teams of all time, Brazil, for their first game on the pitch. North Korea came out and really stuck it to the Brazilians-keeping it scoreless for the first half. I was so proud of them. They played such tight defence that basically Maicon had to curve the ball around the goal post to get one past the North Korean defense. It was beautiful in the most heinous way possible. i cried alittle for the North Koreans-they were out working the Brazilians for most of the game. And then Brazil scored again...poop. But all of a sudden North Korea threw caution to the wind and started pushing at the Brazilian goalie...Julio Caesar...pretty much his mum was dreaming big when she named him...
anyway,
then North Korea scored. I screamed and screamed. They were so excited about their goal too. They, the democratic peoples republic of Korea scored a goal on one of the tournament favorites.
They still lost 2-1.
And their dreams of keeping the Brazilians scoreless didn't happen.
They were still the weaker team, and the final score showed it.
but before the game ended, they scored, and their joy and recovering alittle of the footing that had started to slip away from them was tangible. I mean if you've ever seen communists get excited...it's pretty impressive. The coach pumped his fist and (AND) cracked a smile...yup, impressive.
So yesterday North Korea dreamed of beating Brazil, and today that thought just stayed hovering in the atmosphere, then disappearing completely like a breath of frosty air. But dreams are still good even if they do vanish into thin air, and all you have left to show for your experience is the sound of your own exhale. Just keep breathing.
PS North korea's goalie has got mad skills, he can drop kick a ball from one side of the pitch to the other...he can practically score a goal in the opposing net...plus, he's pretty hot...go North Korea:)

Goodbye Roberto Baggio, Hello Paraguay!

It's the World Cup of goodness this month. That means, on every break and free day i will be watching soccer ( or football). The love of this game has taken over most of my co-workers by storm. Just to name a couple examples, Micha is from Paraguay, Liz has Mexican roots, and I decided to cheer for all the Asian teams (until they play Paraguay)... Japan totally won the other day and that made me happy. I can't just have one team otherwise it wouldn't justify watching as many games as I will, I don't know why this makes sense to me, but it does make me happy. Anyway, yesterday, we were all cheering on Paraguay while they played my favorite team of all time-Italy. italy has held a soft spot with me since I cheered for Roberto Baggio and would wake up at 4am to have mums home made tomatoe soup during the final game. But yesterday it was all Paraguay, who was the underdog by the commentators standards-but what do commentators know-I believe in Paraguay and yesterday they tied Italy, who is a favorite to win the Cup, also Paraguay's goalie is super hot...so go Paraguay...

A tyPicaL CmU suMmEr stAff meEttIng

"Your racist!" Micha to Ben.



"I really don't think you can buy an I-phone in Paraguay, and plus their technology is way behind what we're capable of here in Canada." Ben to Micha.

"Did anyone see the finale of House?" Alec.

"I mean just look at the new I-phone 4.0 coming out in the fall. I want it so bad. It has video calling with wifi." Ben again.

"Mennonites who come from Paraguay to Canada always make fun of the ones they left behind, they think we don't know how to read or write or something. They say we are so dumb." Micha.

"Well, you don't have I-phones." Ben again.

"No, but did you see the finale of Grey's?" Kathleen.

"We have I-phones in Paraguay. And their cheaper than here in Canada too." Micha.

"Kathleen, your 2 minutes and 44 seconds late." Alec.

"It was so intense, a mass murderer just started shooting people in the hospital, everyone was dying." Kathleen.

"45...46...You better sit down. 47...48..." Alec to Kathleen.

"How early did you get here Raquelle?" I ask.

"7:20 am ( fourty minutes before shift starts)." Raquelle.

"Raquelle!?! I only woke up at 7:20 am!" I say. (thinking about how I hit snooze twice too)

"49...50...51...Kathleen you better sit down." Alec.

"Does anyone want to buy my I-phone so I can get the new 4.0 when it comes out?" Ben.

"I just knew it was going to rain so I wanted to get here without getting rained on." Raquelle in defense.

"I'm too cheap to spend 4 dollars to upgrade to a 3.0. So why would I buy yours?" Scott to Ben.

"I used to watch Grey's but I lost interest after everyone got together and was happy." I say to Kathleen.

"It really bugs me how you 'first'-worlder's judges us developing countries. You think you know everything. You don't." Micha to Ben.

"Look at the apps for the 4.0, I need it so much! Should i get it in black or white?" Ben.

"52...53...54..." Alec.

"I think you should get it in white-with a purple case-." I say to Ben both looking at eachother and at the exact same time going..."ahhhhhhhhhh"

"To match my bedroom!" Ben shouts in joy at the pure genius of my input.

"Is there coffee in the kitchen?" Kathleen

"55...56...57..." Alec

"Yes." Me and Micha together.

Micha gets up and walks away.

"Hey, deveoping country, where are you going?" I ask. (as soon as i say it I start feeling guilty about calling her third world.)

"I have to get to work." Micha gives me 'the look' as she leaves...

"58...59..." Alec

"Regualer cleaning is Katherine Freisen hallways and stairwells and Concord linen and utility rooms." Raquelle lists the to-do's...

Kathleen sits down. We commence dividing the tasks of the day up between ourselves.

Summer Lovin...

the puzzles....

the cooking...

the not so cooking...cooking...

true story, i blogged about my coworkers...you might have read it, so have they now...so that means pressure...pressure to come up with equally pithy and inspirational little posts about my time with them...and since every moment with them is blogworthy, scintillating, or just down right entertaining I am quite frankly, blocked. As in writers block. In other words I am speechless. This is bad, very bad.

On the other hand...

No make-up may is done...I am wearing mascara and loving it. I have eyelashes again. Hurray!

So yes, while I sit here not being able to think of how to describe Ben-so he is leaping off the page at you like his shoes so often fly out of his hands at my head during evening lock up...I am calmed by the fact that I have eyelashes, this is good. Yes, mascara is my friend...