I have been thinking lately, yes, mainly because thinking is about the only free thing left in this world. Also, I find I quite enjoy it, thinking...I think.
As I was saying, recently I have been thinking about coping mechanisms. Or habits a person develops in response to different situations, like test stress. Final exams and midterms and all those horrid things that bring ordinary normal functioning people to the point of hysteria and mental anguish. I used to think that after taking so many tests one might eventually grow this ability to not be overwhelmed by them. I mean practice make perfect right? So I thought. If someone had, in the past, feared such situations by continually subjecting themselves to such situations they would eventually develop this resistance to it and be victorious right?...like bacteria and antibiotics...and in this case one would wish to be the bacteria as opposed to the antibiotics...
anyway...
I thought about how I used to deal with my test anxiety and i happily report that some major changes have been made with regard to this situation in my own life. Although not quite to the victorious conqueror stage, I think my story can still inspire those who have yet to 'master' the stress of tests...
I used to feel so overwhelmed that I would have to do something that would calm me down...like laundry before I could even begin to tackle the test material itself. Sometimes i would even launder clean clothes in order to prolong this necessary step. Then, in order to maintain energy and brain function i would make myself the largest bowl of ice cream that there was to congratulate myself for finally opening my textbooks to study. After eating I would patiently remind myself that it is not good for one's digestion to be too serious after consuming so much sugar and so I would make myself wait even longer before I could finally get some studying in. Eventually, I would study, but then it would be bedtime. One has to go to bed early in order to have enough sleep to think for the test the next day and so the study day-so carefully crafted out-would end with little to no studying done, and even more anxiety upon the next day's arrival. That was how I used to handle my test anxiety...
Now, I find myself much better equipped to handle my lack of motivation to study. I take careful steps to ensure there is no ice cream in the freezer...ever...because you can never be too sure of yourself. Instead of doing my favorite household chore (laundry) as i avoid the books in question, I now do my most hated household chore...I cook, and clean the floors...I hate floors and cooking is somewhat stressful in an of itself to me, in this way I am punishing myself efficiently for my lack of studiousness. i feel so much better about doing this than before when i used to pamper myself with the laundry. But as I cut carrot sticks and place them in the fridge for lunches during the week I realize that I really do need to practise what I preach and from the kitchen window I see the beautiful fall day...I should go for a walk. I know, it's like I'm taking all that head knowledge and applying it in order to get even better understanding of all that I already know about the body and it's need for circulation and ambulation...off I go...some people just study for their tests...i walk for mine..all that blood rushing to my head...eventually i walk so far I find myself at McD's...and lo and behold there's some change in my pocket...I don't plan these things, McD's just happen...they're everywhere. And as I sit with my hot fudge sundae, i think to myself...I am so glad I don't buy ice cream anymore!
1 comment:
i wonder how the rest of the world gets by without your blog to read.
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