if

I'll sit in the university Starbucks. I'll wait for you so we can have coffee...my treat. That would work, I think, you like treats. So I'll be waiting with my boring latte that I know you'll give me a hard time about. I would wait for you to show up.
Wondering what you would drink-probably a frap-an extra espresso shot, maybe just an espresso, but for some reason i really can't picture you having a sugarless drink. Or tea. Thinking about how long it has been since I've seen you...knowing that really, I would have no idea what you would order. Nervous, wondering...wondering if I'll recognize you. What if your a yuppie with your i-phone? What if your a hippie with a beard? What if...
Just for a day, if we could meet. You would breeze in late, on the go, reminding me that your taking time out of a ridiculously amazing life to acknowledge me. But I won't mind, just glad it's you. I would catch you up and talk about everything. I would tell you about all these people you need to meet. Go on and on about stressed out I am, and then, you'll stop the whirlwind just by your laugh. I know you will laugh at me, and as much as I'll love hearing it; you'd still manage to really emphasize the whole laughing at me part...not even beginning to acknowledge the fact that maybe I am playing the paranoid, melodramatic person for a reason. Maybe I want to make you laugh... just because your naturally funny while I have to make a complete fool of myself to get laughs doesn't mean your funnier than me. well, maybe. I am offended just thinking about it. You, making me laugh while you laugh at me, which makes me feel even more lame. You always win, some things don't change, at least I don't think that part would...I didn't forget to ask you how your doing, I just know your amazing.
And after talking and laughing, you'd be off again. Someone more important to meet. Rushing through what's left of our drinks, we'd barely manage a proper goodbye, forgetting how final they can be...but maybe some things do change. Maybe this time I would realize how much a hug means...I'd grab you and for a moment, in front of random strangers, I'd cry like a baby and make you promise to stay in better touch. Wailing about how much i miss you and getting you back the only way i know how...by embarrassing you. then you'd be gone again...

still waiting, sitting with my boring old latte, wondering...if you really did show up, just a breath away...to hear me say, Happy 26th Birthday!