sometimes i think about revenge...

a theme wedding...

it would be musical/ballerina...

and yes, that means that all the the bridesmaids and groomsmen would have to wear body-tards (whatever they call them) in grey...Yes grey...and the girls would have little pink tu-tu's and then guys will have black ones with black bow ties...

it would be outside in a public park and everyone would be barefoot (who cares if you step in dog/horse crap)...

there would be an open invitation into the newspaper for all around to come...and bring their own blanket to sit on...for a sunrise ceremony...in the rain...it must be raining and tents will be provided for the audience only...

sisters of the bride might be made to sing "sister's" from white christmas as a special number...

upon completion of the ceremony following after the bride and groom each bridesmaid must piroette and leap into the arms of their paired groomsmen (in keeping of the theme of course) where upon they too will be carried past the mass of onlookers...up onto a horse (yes, somehow they would sneek in too) where they would (the bridal party) break into a special number...because it is a musical wedding...

the bridal party must be in the rain or the effect will be completely lost...a special picture taking ceremony will comence after the service...in the rain as well...with the horses too...

and just to make things awkward there would be an invitation only reception about a 2 hour drive away from the place where the wedding would take place...thereby completely claiming the whole day of anyone associated with this lucky pair....

no children will be allowed to attend the reception so people would have to get sitters or leave their children at a local day-care rented out for the evening/night...

a 7 course meal will be served...to the special ones gathered...along with a 7 hour program of slide shows and special moments that must be brought up on 'the big day'...

the bridal party would have to wear their 'tards' the whole time...

there would be a special picture taking of the bridal party at sunset because that's when the sun is setting and great pictures can be had (of course) the bridal party would still be in the 'tards'... these would be the dry pictures as opposed to the previous pictures in the rain...

by the time the reception would completely end it will be well into the night and another picture taking ceremony must be taken to show the effects of one whole day of celebration...

the bride and groom would then leave the country for a period of time so that by the time they return... all will be friends again...


I think this little scenario ended up encapsulating my most cynical thoughts towards weddings... i took a personality test that says i'm neurotic...surprise, surprise...went shopping with the bride and fellow bridesmaids today for another 9am-4pm marathon of doom...but the bridesmaid dress is bought and paid for...it was something the bridesmaids all liked better than the bride i think and so now i feel guilty about sharing witht he bride, insecurities that my new to me bum (as in 10 lbs more of it) does not so much like to be flaunted in a form fitting siloette and successfully steared the bride away from a mermaid style bridesmaid choice...once again successfully putting my vanity over the brides and loosing so many of my new found bridesmaid points...ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i think the bride is ok with the decision...but she would have prefered a mermaid, but i so don't need any more attention drawn to my enns' tail fin...so on my goal of reinventing myself as the perfect bridesmaid i would have to score as follows...
saying yes and getting excited...10
being supportive...10
offering to help if needs arise...10
throwing a wicked awsome shower...10
manipulating the bridesmaid dress choice...-10
...
30/40=B for bad bridesmaid....
must try harder...