Lenten

So what are your lenten activities? Oh the pressure to figure out those lent-ils...lent, lent lenty, lent lent...LENT
I did learn something new this lent...that during the lenten season we are not supposed to be aiming for easter, but observing a period of ...preparation...I have always chided myself into lent by reminding myself that Jesus gave His life, so i must give up or take on something in rememberance of that...'keep my eye on the prize' and all that...missing the point comepletely...that during Lent no one knew what was coming next...on Palm Sunday people weren't thinking about forgivness and death, they were thinking about world domination and a young man taking on the religious rulers and political powers; leading a revolution for a new and glorious establishment for the jewish nation. They were still searching for answers, they were clutching at a promise and they thought they knew what it should look like.
But lent is the unknown, lent is the waiting, lent is shadows, lent is being told to have faith to move a mountain but not understanding what mountains have to do with figs...(Mk 11:20-26)..or faith...
mostly, this go round I have been wondering why I try to nail (no pun intended, but accidental brilliance is allowed right?) God down all the time...I want Easter, but God makes me go through Lent...I guess thats where I struggle. I want everything gift wrapped, express delivery, made to fit, the culmination of every promise. Resolution people! I want the 'it is finished' parts to happen right now. but first there is lent...so this time

I'm waiting.