I have a midterm in less than 2 weeks...my second day of class was today...reality kinda hit today, what was I thinking taking a 3 credit course in a 4 week time frame...
oh and I picked up a shift this week so I have 3 now...because my life is a monopoly game and I keep landing on boardwalk...
on the way to school this morning the bus driver wouldn't let me off and so i missed the connecting bus and did not have time to get a coffee at tim's before class...
my psychology prof told us that it is not uncommon for students to self diagnose themselves during the span of a class due to all the disorders we study...basically I already think I have developmental cognitive problems...basically due to errors in reason and maladaptive thinking i am on the fast track towards developing a mental disorder...and this was only the first class...he gave us a counselling help line # to call...
in anatomy well lets just say we have done a weeks worth of work in the span of 24 hours...help...
oh and some guys asked me to be in their study group...I said no...
then I waited for the bus today and waited and waited and waited....
bought groceries and came home...made supper-consisting of a toasted bagel...and while reading an email forgot about it...
smoke? what? where is that coming from???? yes, it was my bagel...now a lump of coal...my early christmas gift....
all I could think about was if the smoke alarm went off and my apartment building got evacuated the firefighters would find me in my pajama shirt with crap all over my face ( i put a mask on cause I am having a stress breakout....) and two pieces of sad looking bagel...
so I am madly opening windows and waving wet cloths around the smoke detector and turning on the bathroom fan...I am doing this for quite awhile sadly watching a great billow of grey smoke move from the kitchen to the living room...and very slowly out the window...
2 things to be thankful for, my neighbor did not walk by and see me in said state...and the alarm never went off...small blessings but right now, it is enough.
and so here I sit, with a broken borrowed toaster oven (that me and my roomie have had for a grande total of 4 days) an anatomy textbook, my blob (of course)...and some cheese...
so Kath, yes I will try and continue studying, and being productive....but I can't calm down, I just can't! your son was the inspiration for this post and Ry, I hope you enjoy my public shame...
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