I am freaking out. Usually I reach this point and a bag of Miss Vickies salt and vinigar help...they are a cure all for what ails you...but no relief was found yesterday. I ate the whole freaking bag and am at work the next day blogging about my life because I am spazing so bad.
What am I spazing about you ask?
being vulnerable for one. it sucks.
and yesterday I ws having my occasional devotional moment and was struck witht he fact that I look alot like a yuppie right now. A workaholic, eating out, watch my favorite shows lame-o yuppie and I have been freaking out ever since.
Last year at this time I was realizing that being an idealist and chasing the angalina 'feeding the poor and needy' is not as pure a goal as I had thought. Oh and it's a lot harder than you think it will be. And now after running home and recouping and paying off the thousands it took me to give a few hundred (and some pretty incredible momnets) to the poor and needy. I am stuck in a good paying job, with a good car in a nice town and some good friends and money to burn and cute clothes and nursing school and a stable career ahead of me...and I realize I am a yuppie...a lame-o
I guess God has grace for even yuppie's but I sometimes wonder if all this goodness is superficial and all the crazyiness of the poor and needy isn't something special. It was certainly more exciting as well as being messy and hard and sometimes hurtful...
but here I sit, a guppie in my fishbowl remembering the sea...
dang it this hasn't solved anything!
1 comment:
you call it the yuppie life. i call it copeing/dealing/healing. it won't last forever because deep down it's not what you want for yourself...in the mean time, i wouldn't mind a yuppie friend around! love you!
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